


murdering your uncle for fun and profit

by Asuka Kureru (Askerian)



Category: Girl Genius (Webcomic)
Genre: Dysfunctional Family, Ficlet, Gen, Humor, get wrecked aaronev
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-22
Updated: 2020-09-22
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:27:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26595202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Askerian/pseuds/Asuka%20Kureru
Summary: chaosandcats asked: Martellus, Tarvek, and Anevka fix it/humor, murdering your uncle for fun and profit
Relationships: Anevka Sturmvoraus & Tarvek Sturmvoraus, Martellus "Tweedle" von Blitzengaard & Anevka Sturmvoraus, Martellus "Tweedle" von Blitzengaard & Tarvek Sturmvoraus
Comments: 12
Kudos: 140





	murdering your uncle for fun and profit

“I can’t believe you went behind my _back_ to arrange–”

“What are you even complaining about,” Martellus interrupted, dryly bored as he pulled off his dripping gloves. “ _Your_ hands are still pristine, aren’t they? A diamond-clad alibi.”

Tarvek stared at his much-hated cousin, and then at his sister, standing on the other side of the corpse with a fan over her mouth and her eyes just as cold, just as bored.

Their father kept being very, chunkily dead. 

“Anevka, you – I would have helped you, I would have–”

“You know I was next.”

“I don’t know that and neither do you! You’re his daughter, he wouldn’t have–”

“My father’s his favorite in-law,” Martellus interrupted, eyes heavy-lidded and jaw rolling slowly. “He wasped him yesterday.”

Tarvek inhaled brusquely. 

“Then told him to _tell my little sister to visit_.”

“…Oh.”

Well, that. That was. It was horrible – mind-controlling your own family. But… With their family, it wasn’t – assassination plots everywhere and intrigues and – when you loved someone but they might still be convinced to kill you, then maybe. Maybe you had little choice but to make it so they _couldn’t_ betray you. Maybe… Not that Tarvek had ever thought about it, but. He could see his father thinking about it.

It wasn’t the same as _killing his own daughter_ so that his old lover could take over her body. Their father would _never_ have gone that far. There were limits –

“Tell me what you lost _that you actually had_ ,” Anevka said, cutting, “and hopes for a change of heart doesn’t count.”

Tarvek opened his mouth to yell back, and then – couldn’t. 

Couldn’t, because she was right. 

The best predictor for future behavior was past behavior, and their father had never ever hinted that remorse and familial love were things he had to give.

He’d never had a lot in terms of limits, either.

Tarvek breathed in through his nose. Breathed out.

His father was beyond saving anyway, and this was what he had left. A princedom to rule and living family to keep that way.

Even if he could see them teaming up to get rid of him and then taking each other down once he was out of the way _really_ easily. 

“Alright,” he said, pushing up his sleeves, “Obviously you two have a lot to learn in terms of alibis if you think letting me see the corpse doesn’t count. How do you feel about framing the geisterdamen?”

Anevka’s lips stretched into a slow, unsurprised smile. “A frame! See, Tweedle, he _does_ love us.”

Martellus and Tarvek accidentally rolled their eyes in tandem, and then side-eyed each other warily. 

Martellus gave in eventually, with a careless shrug and a last wary glance at Tarvek’s gently smiling sister. “Fine, if I can keep the spiders.”

Tarvek and Anevka didn’t even have to consult each other to chorus, one with cheer and the other one with disgust, “Oh, dearest cousin, _please_ keep the spiders.”


End file.
